Despite years of training and practice, the thing I still find the hardest to do consistently.
When I hear something that triggers or activates me, I immediately stop listening and go into my world of insecurity, argument, or justification.
And I stay there until I notice what’s happened. Fortunately, this now takes seconds or minutes to catch, versus hours, days, or even months and years to identify, ‘I’ve stopped listening’.
I use a simple structure to keep me in someone’s world when I’m listening.
I stay focused on what’s most important to them – what are they committed to in life?
What do they want to accomplish given that commitment?
And are they in integrity – taking action aligned with the commitment?
In this way I can be of service in acknowledging what is of importance to someone and the alignment of their actions. Or I can interrupt when integrity is out – when someone is saying ‘x’, and they’re doing ‘y’.
Still mastering this one, but I’m inspired by the possibility of being a better listener every day for the rest of my life.